Hate

Hate kept me awake tonight and as a result here I am at 

2:30 in the morning writing this post.  

 I started thinking about all hateful things going on in the world, and what could I say or do that might make a difference.  The longer I laid in bed and thought about it the sadder I got and begin to cry.  Thinking about all those who have lost their lives recently, all because of hate.  Then I begin to wish I could talk to those who are rioting, killing, smashing up private property, burning cars, and ask them why they hate.  What would it take to make them stop acting on their hate? 

Coming from an abusive childhood I have felt hate more than once...it's not pretty.  I escaped it,  so I thought,  by getting married at age 17.  That is when I discovered the hate came with me. It had affected how I looked at men especially since my Dad was the abuser.  God has healed my broken heart over my Dad, which is a whole other story

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Sleep was out of the question so I got up and started writing.  I may never post this but God keeps flooding my brain with thoughts I know I have to at least write them out before my 73-year-old mind loses them.  Besides, I think it's the only way I will quit crying. 

  I wish I could ask everyone, face to face, why do you hate?  I mean I can give you the reason I think you might hate me.  According to what I read, hear, see with my eyes on the news, and social media, because of the color of my skin I am fair game.  I am white, middle class, conservative, and to boot, a Republican.  I know I can be a racist because I am a sinner.  But, me telling you I don't hate you does not stop you from hating me.   

One of the things I did was look up some hate quotes, I wrote a few of them down to comment on.  Just a few. 

"It is easy to hate and it is difficult to love. This is how the whole scheme of things works. All good things are difficult to achieve; and bad things are very easy to get." Confucius   (I have to agree with this one,  being good is hard, I believe because man is sinful.  It takes no courage to be sinful,  yet great courage to fight against the sinfulness and do what is right.)  

"The further a society drifts from truth the more it will hate those who speak it."

(

"Fear of something is at the root of hate for others, and hate within will eventually destroy the hater." 

George Washington Carver

(Goodness,  is this ever true.  It has to be true because those who hate others and riot and destroy property and lives are still doing these things.  Oh, it may stop for a while but one incident they think is wrong will bring the hatred back.  A small disagreement can go from dislike to hate in seconds, why is that?  Again, because we are all sinners.  Even if the Holy Spirit lives in us, hate can be so loud you cannot hear His voice that saying, speak words in love.   

"Hate destroys the very structure of the personality of the hater.... when you start hating anybody, it destroys the very center of your creative response to life and the universe; so love everybody. "    

Martin Luther King, Jr.

 (Agree on this one too.  What little news I have watched I have seen no one is creating anything lately.  In one city they took over a police station, blocks of property yet what did they create? They tore statues down but did not create anything to replace what they tore down.  Life did not get better, people were still killed, garbage piles up because haters usually do not want to pick up their own mess or they would get help for their hate. People lost their business, their livelihood.   Very few of our leaders are creating anything either, too busy hating Trump.  Hate tends to make people lazy and unwilling to work with those they disagree with even for the sake of a life.)

"God tells us in Scripture that hate is a heart issue and that someone who hates a brother is a murderer! (1 John 3:15) We are encouraged to love one another, keep short records of wrongs, and forgive others, not harboring bitterness or anger in our hearts."God

(I  saved this quote for last because I believe this is the truth about hate.  God understand hate better than anyone.  There is a time and reason for it that is Godly, God hates sin, not the sinner.  I am able to understand the fringes of God's love for mankind and it enough to make me want to control my sinful hatred and love like Jesus. I can never love as perfectly as He did, but knowing He loves me unconditionally gives me the courage to attempt to love like Him.  At this moment,  I hate no one. But I am sad for many and wish I could fix this hatred that is ruining our country and people. )

It's time to do the one thing I can do which has more power than even our president. PRAY to the Lord to change hearts.  As for me personally,  pray God gives me the courage and the wisdom to speak in love when I should and wisdom to be quiet when needed.  

I Can't or Can I?

This picture caught my eye,  because it says what no one knows is being said in my head.  I've been in this place before, several times in fact. When my mind hangs between the I can't and I can.  Each time this place has driven me to a low , a depressed place. Oh, it's not deep depression,  but just enough to make me sad and weak. 

Today I was reading some of my older posts and this one popped up to remind me of a truth that has power to finishes cutting that, 't", from the I can't to the  I CAN.   Phil. 4:13,  states it very clearly, I CAN do all things through Him who strengthens me. 

  When I am at my lowest, confounded by the obstacle, I have discovered an astonishing truth.  God is attracted to weakness.  He can’t resist those who humbly and honestly admit how desperately they need Him.  Our weakness, in fact, makes room for His power.

I would bet you have been there, confused, troubled, wondering when would it all stop, and the peace return. 

Before you start thinking, wow, Betty must be going through some awful trial.  Not really, and like I said I have been in this place emotionally before.

We have made a major move lately from southern California where we have lived since 2012 to northern Minnesota.  We had gotten comfortable in Ca., which is something I thought I would never say.    And, I say this every time this happens, my husband and I should be pro's at this moving business!  We have sure experience our share of it, leaving the comfortable for the unknown.  Yet every time we both fall into the same pit and our weakness shows up.  Which is why I am grateful God is attracted to weakness.  He can't resist us when we call out for help in our struggles.  He never says, get over it buttercup, or grow up you wimps.   

Rick Warren says this, "real spiritual growth is never an isolated, individualistic pursuit.  Maturity is produced through relationships and community.  

So here we are, living in a new community,  looking to build new relationships, find ways to minister and be ministered too.  

I have to admit we are both a little weary over it all.  Part of me wants to run back to the familiar, to be comfortable once again.  And, yes, my husband and I are a little sad at times.  

Do we intellectually and spiritually know this too will pass?  Yes, yes, yes.  But I had to write about it because it's on my heart and it always helps me to put my heart out there for all to see so you can pray.  I, we, my husband and I need your prayers.  We don't want to waste this time of learning what God has for us during this change. 

I'm gonna end this post with a big old shout out to the Lord.    BRING ON THE POWER GOD, USE US FOR YOUR GLORY IN THIS NEW PLACE.