I believe

This political mess is becoming a circus, each candidate running for office screaming they have the right way to run our country.  Each one spending tons of money trying to get us to believe they can fix this mess.  It's going to be a great disappointment to those who put their faith in their words.  No earthly man can fix our problems.   This mess does not shake my faith though for it is not in these men  who are running for office.  We are just where we are suppose to be according to the bible and God is working His plan for this world and it won't matter who is president, they will not over ride God's plans.  I am sticking right with the One I believe in.  He is faithful, He never fails me, He does exactly what He says He will do, His mercies are new everyday, His love is never ending.  Thank God He does not have to run for office of my heart every 4-8 years.  He ran for His office for 33 years, took His campaign all the way to the  cross  where His most famous speech was only three words, "IT IS FINISHED".   The world thought He was done until He did exactly what He said He would do  by rising from the grave, claiming victory over death for those who believe all He proclaimed.  

Changing roles

A friend and I were discussing how much our lives had changed as we have aged.   Recently I had to get hearing aids...and I might need a knee replacements, all those things we associate with being  old.   My grandchildren see this aging business through different eye, they never say,  Grandma, you are getting older, they just blurt it out, Grandma you are old.   Really it's not till stage 10 we see getting older possible in our life.  That's the age we wish we could live life over or have another life to live. 
  
The below is taken from a book by a Dr. Thomas Armstrong on how he sees the 12 stages of life.  But, I think he has left out one stage.  See if you can name it.  

1. Prebirth:  Potential – The child who has not yet been born could become anything –
2. Birth:  Hope – When a child is born, it instills in its parents and other caregivers a sense of optimism; a sense that this new life may bring something new and special into the world. 
3. Infancy (Ages 0-3):   Vitality – The infant is a vibrant and seemingly unlimited source of energy. 
4. Early Childhood (Ages 3-6):  Playfulness – When young children play, they recreate the world anew.  They take what is and combine it with the what is possible to fashion events that have never been seen before in the history of the world.  
5. Middle Childhood (Ages 6-8):  Imagination – In middle childhoood, the sense of an inner subjective self develops for the first time, and this self is alive with images taken in from the outer world.
6. Late Childhood (Ages 9-11):  Ingenuity – Older children have acquired a wide range of social and technical skills that enable them to come up with marvelous strategies and inventive solutions for dealing with the increasing pressures that society places on them. 
7. Adolescence (Ages 12-20):  Passion -  The biological event of puberty unleashes a powerful set of changes in the adolescent body that reflect themselves in a teenager’s sexual, emotional, cultural, and/or spiritual passion.  
8. Early Adulthood (Ages 20-35):  Enterprise –  It takes enterprise for young adults to accomplish their many responsibilities, including finding a home and mate, establishing a family or circle of friends, and/or getting a good job.  
9. Midlife (Ages 35-50):  Contemplation – After many years in young adulthood of following society’s scripts for creating a life, people in midlife often take a break from worldly responsibilities to reflect upon the deeper meaning of their lives, the better to forge ahead with new understanding.  
10. Mature Adulthood (Ages 50-80): Benevolence – Those in mature adulthood have raised families, established themselves in their work life, and become contributors to the betterment of society through volunteerism, mentorships, and other forms of philanthropy.  All of humanity benefits from their benevolence.  (Thats me, right there, in mature adulthood).  
11. Late Adulthood (Age 80+):  Wisdom – Those with long lives have acquired a rich repository of experiences that they can use to help guide others.  Elders thus represent the source of wisdom that exists in each of us, helping us to avoid the mistakes of the past while reaping the benefits of life’s lessons.    
12. Death & Dying:   Those in our lives who are dying, or who have died, teach us about the value of living.  They remind us not to take our lives for granted, but to live each moment of life to its fullest, and to remember that our own small lives form of a part of a greater whole. 

    Since I cannot go back through 1 to 9 stage  my only recourse is to trust Him to use me to give Him glory.  To use the wisdom I have gained from each transition to help someone maybe not make some of my mistakes and when they do, love on them with grace.    Help them to understand their mistakes do not have to define their life, they are only  part of life here on earth.   

Remember, I wrote there was one stage he left out, step 13, it's the icing on the cake. It makes all other stages pail in comparison.  I am sure you guessed it by now, it's the after life and it's as real as all the other 12 steps.  It's this step that I hold onto when I can't sleep because of knee pain or any pain this "older body" has.  There is more to His story living in me then getting older.   God does not want us to waste the stages of life.  

What stage of life are you in and how are you handling it?

Joey+Rory In The Time That You Gave Me

Like most everyone I have been following the journey of Joey Feeks as she battled cancer and over and over I have been impressed with the faith she and her husband Rory has shown to the whole world.   There is joy in my heart for this beautiful saint of God who no longer is in pain.  And there is even joy in my heart for the family left behind because Joey left them a peace money cannot buy.  Her peace will carry them over the rough times, and  it will carry them someday to a reunion in heaven. 

Of all her songs this one rings in my heart today.  

Stories

Are you a good story teller?  

Sanford Graduate School has some tips on telling stories by Communication lecturer JD Schramm.

Connect with Individuals

"Deliver one thought to one person in the room," Schramm advised, "and then turn your body and deliver another complete thought to another person. Have that moment. Eye contact is gold in storytelling. The more you can connect and pierce into somebody's eyes, the more you can break down resistance." It's also a good idea to step toward the audience and use hand gestures to illustrate points, rather than stay fixed and frozen in one place.

As in Music, Silence is Effective

"You might use moments of silence to let people catch up with you, or to frame something, like the first time you use a phrase or an acronym. Or you can use silence just to get everybody's attention, "Just a few seconds, appropriately used, can add emphasis to your presentation."

Don't Read or Memorize the Manuscript, Nor Try to Speak Off-the-cuff.

It's much more reliable and effective to memorize a list of bullet points and then practice telling the story over and over again, keeping the mental list as a reference.

Use PowerPoint Wisely

Slides should emphasize photography, illustrations, or charts, not words.

Know Your AIM: Audience, Intent, and Message

What do you want your audience to do as a result of this communication? "Sometimes you have to be explicit and say, 'I want donors,'". Other times you just want the audience to embrace an idea, or re-share the information with others. In any case, he said, "The best thing you can do is share a little bit at first, and have your listeners ask for more."

Use Personal Anecdotes, Self-deprecating Humor, and Accessible Language

Don't try to provide a thorough overview of your organization or focus solely on the tactical, factual sides of your story. Keep technical jargon to a minimum.

What do you think about Fato's story, did it bore you or captivate your heart? 

Hindrance...

Have you ever felt defective? Like there is some part of you that got messed up and now
God could not use you as you had hoped. 

This question hit home because I had failed, ONCE AGAIN, in speaking  truth with love to someone.   As soon as the angry words were out of my mouth I knew I had stepped on the devils territory.  From that point on my thought life took on a destructive pattern with words such as:  you are really not fit to teach a bible study, you cannot control  your mouth.   I am not shocked that I sin, but shocked at how quickly I get defeated over it.  How easily I want to crawl into a pit like a coward and not show my face to anyone.  

Thank God, thank God for I John 1:9  This precious word of truth gives me strength to come out of the pit.  

God used a message I read not to long ago about Nehemiah and the  hindrance he came up against as he served the Lord.  

1.  Neh. 6:1-4, Don't negotiate...that is what Eve did and we know the out come of that.   Ever try to negotiate with God? Wrong way to handle our sin.  When it comes to our sin we blame whoever is around for the reason we acted like we did. 

2. Neh. 6:5-9.  Don't give into intimidation.  If the devil can't take you out of serving, he'll try to scare you out.   

3.  Neh. 6:10-13. Don't fall prey to elimination.  The devil will try to trip us up with our sin and ruin your witness before others. If he can get us to lose our temper, build upon pride or get involved in some questionable business we can be elimination from serving God.  Eph. 5:15-17  Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men or women but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil.  So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.  

4. Neh. 6:15-19 Maintain your supplication. Pray, pray, pray a minute, an hour, when you walk, lie down, ride in your car, You got to have a Holy determined to handle hindrance. You got to have a faith that believes God can help you over come any sin in God's strength which He will liberally give to those who will humble themselves and pray

“Whoever is truly humbled — will not be easily angry, nor harsh or critical of others. He will be compassionate and tender to the infirmities of his fellow-sinners, knowing that if there is a difference — it is grace alone which has made it! He knows that he has the seeds of every evil in his own heart. And under all trials and afflictions — he will look to the hand of the Lord, and lay his mouth in the dust, acknowledging that he suffers much less than his iniquities have deserved.” 

― John Newton,   (Can I get an Amen?)

   

Loving through discipline

A few weeks ago my seven year old grand daughter and I were talking about the discipline  she had received from her Daddy over disobeying him.   I said, you know why your Daddy disciplined you?  She said no.  I said,  because he loves you.  Quickly she said, no, that's not true!  Her little mind  could not comprehend how a spanking and love could go hand in hand. I hope when she is an adult she will understand this truth.  Sad to say, some never do. 


Below is a few points  from Effective Parenting in a Defective World by Don Dinkmeyer, after thoughts in red are mine.  He is speaking to parents about disciplining their children but when I read over the list I thought to myself, if it's good enough for young children it's good enough for this older child of God. 

1. The necessity of discipline: to deter destruction:  (As an adult I understand this principal, that God loves me too much to let me get by for very long with disobedience). 

2.The means of discipline: actions and words . In the Proverbs 3:11 passage that is quoted in Hebrews, two different Hebrew words are used: yasar (discipline), which involves God's actions; and yakach (rebuke), which refers to God's words. Hebrews 12:5 tells us not to make light of God's actions and not to lose heart at His words of rebuke. Yasar refers to disciplinary actions; yakach refers to corrective words.  (God never, ever say something without backing it up with action).

3.The motive in discipline: to express love.  (The more we believe this, the more we sink our life in Him instead of ourselves).

4. The goal of discipline: to teach obedience . When you teach your children godly submission, you're teaching them to do the right thing for the right reason. You want them to get beyond the point where they say "I've got to" and get them to the point of obeying out of love and trust. 
(Exactly what God wants to teach us adults).

5. The result of discipline: short-term pain and long-term gain.  All discipline — not some or even most, but all — seems not to be pleasant, but painful. But there's a process involved; those who have been trained by it yield the fruit of righteousness.  ( I would not trade the times God has had to discipline me for anything.  Those times have  taught me the truth that nothing can separate me from the love of God, not even my own disobedience).

Our 7 year old grand daughter will have to have her own children someday to really understand all the principals of a father and mother who loves their children enough to discipline them.  When she does,  she will thank her Daddy for loving her through discipline.

Final thought:  God does not discipline us to subdue us, but to condition us for a life of usefulness and blessedness. 
Billy Graham

A Greater Purpose Then Happiness

The theme over at "The High Calling several months ago was "live happy",  but I could not get it together in time for the deadline.   So not to waste it, I thought why not use it for my first post of 2016. 

In my younger years I could easily name the thing I thought would bring me happiness.  A good man with a good job, a house with children to fill it.  And after 12  years of marriage and six miscarriages our first daughter was born so we bought a house from the good wages my husband was making.  Everything was in order for happiness to flow and it did often because I  got all I wanted.  
(Anybody see a problem though in what I just wrote? in case you didn't let me help you. My early take on happiness was on the foundation I got what I wanted.)

It's a proven fact material things will not bring lasting happiness, instant gratification, yes, but as soon as one see something better, the old ceases to bring happiness. 

Through the years God has put me in several places that would not insure happiness.  In fact I became very unhappy at times yet  I knew God wanted me in those place so I stuck it out for a greater purpose then "happiness"

In September 1942, Viktor Frankl, a prominent Jewish psychiatrist and neurologist in Vienna, was arrested and transported to a Nazi concentration camp with his wife and parents. Three years later, when his camp was liberated, most of his family, including his pregnant wife, had perished -- but he, prisoner number 119104, had lived. In his bestselling 1946 book, Man's Search for Meaning, which he wrote in nine days about his experiences in the camps, Frankl concluded that the difference between those who had lived and those who had died came down to one thing: Meaning, an insight he came to early in life. When he was a high school student, one of his science teachers declared to the class, "Life is nothing more than a combustion process, a process of oxidation." Frankl jumped out of his chair and responded, "Sir, if this is so, then what can be the meaning of life?"

 "Happiness without meaning characterizes a relatively shallow, self-absorbed or even selfish life, in which things go well, needs and desire are easily satisfied, and difficult or taxing entanglements are avoided," the author write.

  When Jesus encountered the woman at the well, He told her that if she understood the gift of God and who it was who asked her for a drink, she would have asked for something different. If you and I understood God, we would ask Him for other things…things that He plants in our spirits. Let this next year be a time to grow in Him, to understand Him more each day…then we will ask for “other things”.

Safe Haven Bible Study

 

If I could pick a theme for this year, it would be, Understanding God more.

What would you chose for 2016?

 

Bring an umbrella

 .Science tells us we can’t stop anticipation from happening. The human brain is always on and always working. Anticipation is rooted in the portion of the brain known as the cerebellum, which controls “automatic, “non-thinking” behavior. (Now,  how many of you knew that little fact?)

With  anticipation always in play, the human brain desires more Dopamine. Dopamine is a chemical neurotransmitter. It’s released from the brain’s frontal lobe and acts as a stimulant that prevents pain, stimulates arousal and causes excitement. Dopamine stimulation happens when we experience and expect good things. Anticipating positive events sustains the output of dopamine into the brain’s chemical pathways.

Scientific experiments show that most people anticipate future positive events, as opposed to future negative events. 

It doesn’t matter if you’re an optimist or a pessimist; the brain is wired to anticipate positive experiences.  ( God sure did create a great brain)
 ________________________________________________________________________________

All the above is knowledge for the head, now here is  some heart knowledge on, "anticipation", which is a powerful Biblical principal. 

To anticipate is ‘to foresee and act in advance of, example....

In Exodus 12, Moses instructed the Israelite's to get ready immediately for their immediate exodus from Egypt. They were to eat the Passover lamb in anticipation—clothed, prepared and ready to go on their journey. (Exodus 12:11)

Get ready! It is time to move!

 Anticipation is an expression of faith

Anticipation is about preparing and making room for what you know is yours by faith. It is getting ready for what God has told you is coming.

Noah began building the ark—a large boat—in anticipation of a flood. Hebrews tells us, ‘By faith Noah, when warned about things not yet seen, in holy fear built an ark to save his family.’ (Heb 11:7)

‘Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.’ (Heb 11:1

Ten people gather to pray for rain in a time of drought. One person brings an umbrella. That’s 

anticipation!

Our family is not ark builders, nor are we preparing for an exodus from the United States,  but we  did start planning for a family reunion this Christmas. 

Our goal way back was to all be together in one house for Christmas this year.  Since last Christmas we had been putting aside a little funds just for this special event.  And God started working out the details and with each answered prayer our anticipation grew.  

 About three and half months ago  we, along with our son and family decided to do the California thing and rent a house together.   We had been looking for over a year for just the right house that would work for two families and God in His timing provided, and it's perfect for our family get together. 

This past weeks I have prepared everyone's favorite candy, cookies, bought the ham and turkey, stocked our cabinets with lots of goodies, planned our menus, checked on museums and zoos to go see,  and even praying about going to a theme park.  Honestly though,  our number one thing to do is just hang out together, play games together, do some hiking together, and of course eat all I have prepared.  

 There must be a lot of Dopamine stirring in my brain because I am super excited. Today is the day our faith will be come sight when our daughter and family step off the plane.

A friend ask me a few weeks ago, what if something happens and your plans do not come to pass.  It would be a huge disappointment but I trust the Lord to help me if that happens.  He did not promise us a family reunion here on this earth.  But there is one coming someday that no one can stop because God has planned it, prepared for it and He will bring it to pass.  The anticipation is building for that day when He shouts and calls us home.  But for now I am going to enjoy this Christmas to it's fullest.  

 This song popped into my heart as I wrote that last paragraph. 
 What a day that will be when my Jesus I shall see

When I look upon His face , the one who saved me by His grace

When He takes me by the hand and leads me through the promise land

What a day glorious day that will be

(I've got my umbrella ready and waiting for that glorious day). 

                      Merry Christmas 

Latest update...on Member Care ministry.

 

    A recent ministry trip to visit some missionaries on home assignment had us driving through
Northern California and into Oregon where there was snow on the mountains surround by beautiful fall colors.  I know Ace got tired of me saying, oh stop here, then just around the next bend, I repeated it, please stop.  Thank God he is a patience man and even took pictures for me.

I started thanking the Lord for the meetings that prompted us to travel over 2000 miles and meet with eight missionaries. Our first stop was Fresno, California where we had our first meeting with a couple who had just returned to the states.  That night we met up with a gal, Mary,  who served in Papua New Guinea for years. It was encouraging to hear how God was meeting her needs since she returned.

Next day we head into southern Oregon, making it in time for the church service  at the church (Foots Creek) we attend when in that area.  That night they were celebrating Thanksgiving, it was great connecting with folks we had met on a previous trip.  

We fell into bed contented knowing  each meeting had the hand of God on it.  The third day of our trip while Ace was getting a transmission issue looked at , I visit a young mother who had served in South East Asia that was home due to family issues.  We talked for hours about what God has been teaching her about trusting Him. That night we went to dinner at the home of the worship leader of Foot Creeks church.  They had also invited a couple we had met at the Harvest Party who is very interested in New Tribes Mission.  To our surprise this couple wanted to meet us for breakfast and talk more about missions.  Our excitement was building as they ask one question after another about missions.

We had already arranged a meeting with another couple the next day and also spend some more time with the young mother home from Asia due to family issues.
 An extra bonus, we got to take her two girls to McDonalds and give her a little break.  We try to look for practical ways to help beside just sitting in meetings.

Our main ministry is to connect with those on home assignment but we always try to meet up with a retired missionary in whatever  area we are visiting.   We love to hear their stories, draw from the wisdom and insight God has given them through the years.  But mostly we just want to take them out to eat and say, thank you for your years of service.  John Jette was living about an hour away from where we were staying so we connected with him and he was willing to meet us at a great restaurant. John served 31 years in Papua New Guinea, mostly in the Aria tribe where he translated the bible into their language. He has the best stories, one in particular we love to hear him tell is when he tossed out of boat into the ocean for 7-8 hours in the open sea.  A government boat finally picked him up and told him he was the catch of the day. 


Our goal was to keep this update to one page.  We had several more visits and will share them next time.  The longer we do the Member Care ministry the more we see the importance of it.  To be able to give an understanding ear, counsel, encouragement and resources is just one way to help a missionary adjust back to stateside living. 

Thank you so much for your prayers and financial support that makes it possible for us to be flexible with those who have given their lives to take the gospel to the least reached.  It's your support that buys our gas, pays for the meal we share with missionaries, supply the  resources  when needed.  It's about being part of a team whose goal is reaching the lost. Thank you.  
        
                                      In His Service, Ace and Betty Draper.

Going Deep

The picture on the left is called an underwater base jump.  It reminded me of Proverb 20:5 The purpose of a man's heart are deep water, but a man of understanding draws them out.  

Recently our mission held a coaching workshop giving us another tool to Member Care others. Below is the highlights that stood out to me.  

Coaching is an on-going intentional conversation that empowers a person or group to fully live out God's calling.  Keith E. Webb 
In couching, the focus is on the one being coached.  Steve Ogne says, if you are talking, you are not listening. There is a 80/20 percent rule in couching.   The coachee talks the most, they create their own action plans, they set the agenda.  Listening is of great value to the coachee and a wonderful gift to give.  Another great part of coaching is its about the person not the problem, I love this point.  

"I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you, the riches of His glorious inheritance n the saint, and His in comparable great power for us who believe."  Ephesians 1:18-19  A coach can help others see what God has already put inside them.

A coach provides the process not the content.  A great question to ask is, "what result would you like to take away from our conversation?  Three times the Gospels record Jesus asking people what they want.  Amazing He has so much to offer, so much insight to their real needs, yet He allows these people to lead the conversation according to how they perceive their own needs or interest. 

Powerful questions come from profound listening and engagement with a person.  What makes a question powerful is it's ability to provoke reflection in the other person. This is where I would like to park and give some of the things I learned and still learning  

1. The question "Why" is difficult to answer because it may force judgments that are premature to the conversation. It is also backward-looking, while we want to be forward-looking. 
2. A closed question is one that can be answered "yes" or "no". 
3.  Open questions require coachees to reflect and to express their thoughts verbally. 
4. Directive questions guide the coachee in a specific direction or to evaluate a specific solution.  5. Emotions questions will give the coachee insight into their behavior, motivations, and plans.  
6. Facts questions answer the who, what, where, when, etc. Be careful not to interrogate!
7. Permission questions create openness by giving the coachee a choice before asking the question.  
8. Pure questions that are neutral and come from a non-judgmental heart. Questions that are judgmental or negative tear down and dis-empower rather than motivate and inspire others.(these are all discussed in more detail in a workshop or in the book)

Like all new tools  you must use it over and over to perfect it.  You can cut your finger off with a power hand saw if you do not practice carefully. Same goes for coaching, counseling, or mentoring, it takes practice to not wound someone with a questions.  The fear of hurting someone instead of helping can drive me to step back and not take the plunge into the deep, the unknown.  But it can also drive me to use caution and humility.   I can trust the Holy Spirit to bring understanding for every encounter I have. 

Most of this post is taken from the book, The Coaching Workshop by Keith E. Webb.  If using couching as a method to help others interest you,  it"s easy to find a web workshop on the internet.   At this point I am coaching one young lady by phone and my husband and I are coaching  a young couple on a weekly basis at their home,  so God is helping us put into practice the things we have learned and still learning.   

"And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, but let us encourage one another ---and all the more as you see the day approaching."Hebrew 10:24-25

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL MY BLOG FRIENDS, THANK YOU FOR THE INSIGHT AND WISDOM YOU SHARE ON YOUR BLOG, ENCOURAGEMENT TO ME AND OTHERS TO CONTINUE TO SHARE JESUS WITH EVERYONE.  BLESSINGS